#5- Women, you matter!

I came across these words of advice on a Facebook group (not sure of the original source), and these are things that I always tell my girl friends when I see they have trouble with men and dating. Women, don't let yourselves be treated like second class citizens. Many girls just settle being treated a certain way, but that needs to change, because you matter! Here are a few words of wisdom that you should carry with you throughout your life:

-If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away.
-If he doesn't want you, nothing can make him stay.
-Stop making excuses for a man and his behavior. Allow your intuition to save you from heartache.
-Never live your life for a man before you find what makes you truly happy.
-If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you correctly, don't jump into being "friends". A friend wouldn't mistreat a friend. And by seeing him more you might only be more tempted to get back into that flawed relationship.
-Don't settle. If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is.
-Don't stay because you think "it will get better." You'll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better.
-The only person you can control in the relationship is you.
-Always have your own set of friends separate from his.
-Maintain boundaries in how a man treats you. If something bothers you, speak up.
-Be proud of your own accomplishments and take pride in all that you do.
-You cannot change a man's behavior. Change comes from within.
-Don't ever make him feel like he is more important than you are... even if he has more education or in a better job. Do not make him a quasi-God. You both value the same!
-Never let a man define who you are.
-A man will only treat you the way you ALLOW him to treat you.
-All men are NOT dogs.
-You should not be the one doing all of the bending.... compromise is a two way street.
-You need time to heal between relationships... there is nothing cute about baggage... deal with your issues before pursuing a new relationship.
-You should never look for someone to complete you... a relationship consists of two WHOLE individuals... look for someone complimentary... not supplementary. Remember that you are each whole people, with your own dreams and goals, you are not half a person!
-Dating is fun.... even if he doesn't turn out to be Mr. Right. And that's how you become more experienced on what type of guy you do like and what you don't. You see what's out there.
-Make him miss you sometimes... when a man always knows where you are, sees you every second of every day, and you're always readily available to him- he takes it for granted.
-Never co-sign for a man.
-Don't fully commit to a man who doesn't give you everything that you need. Keep him in your radar but get to know others.


Share this with other ladies... you'll make someone smile, another rethink her choices, and another woman prepare.
When you eliminate all the bad, the hurtful, and the disrespectful men out of your life, you allow room for a good and decent man to come in.


*Note to men: I am in no way trying to put down your gender. I have met many amazing men and know that there are lots of them out there. (These words of advice could easily be portrayed the other way around!) This is just to help girls, especially those that may settle easily, to be better prepared and to give themselves more value. Thanks for understanding :) I'll take care of you guys next :)


With all my love,
Hennely

#4- Finding similarities among differences

For many people, there are certain things in life that define who they
are for years to come. For me, it was my worldwide travels. I saw many
cultures and learned a few languages, but what I really got out of it
was something much bigger than what I had imagined, something that
defines who I am today.

To this day, I've lived in 4 continents, gone to over 10 schools, and
visited over 20 countries; all this before I hit my 21st birthday. The
experience I got was second-to-none; I've been in deserts, I've
traveled through rainforest, and I've experienced countless cultures.
Nevertheless, there was a much bigger takeaway and here's what it was:

In our world today, we are so quick to find the differences in others:
he smells bad, she speaks funny, he can't pronounce words right, she
wears weird clothing. Sitting on the bus, subway, or anywhere in
public, we find ourselves uncomfortably examining other people. For
example, we notice their tattoos, their loud, colorful shoes, their
strange accents and their messy hair. Anything that the person has or
does that we would never do or wear, we frown upon. But have you ever
tried sitting on that bus, or anywhere in public and look instead for
the things that make you two similar?

A lot of us think that we have nothing in common with other cultures
or nationalities. Whether they are Hispanics, Arabs, or Asians, we
pull ourselves apart without ever really knowing who they truly are.
All it takes is just looking for the similarities among the
differences. You may notice that the lady who isn't pronouncing words
correctly has a 2-year-old son just like you, or that the girl dressed
in a way that you would never dress seems to like hot pink, just like
you. These may just be little things, but when you start looking for
similarities, you see the world in a different light; a more positive
one where everyone is united instead of being separated into
categories of outcasts.

We should appreciate the things that make us all different, but also
realize that we all have a lot more in common that we think. We are
all teenagers, mothers, girlfriends or sons just going through the
same types of struggles that one goes through at different phases of
our lives. We are all going through image issues when we're 14, trying
to live up to our parent's standards when we're going to college, and
making sure we have a way to feed our kids when we are mothers and
fathers. That's the huge lesson I learned from my all my years of
traveling and one that I will always take with me. Try it the next
time you are out. Trust me, it will make this world seem like a much
friendlier place. :)

With all my love,
Hennely

#3- Finding an apartment in New York.

Now, before you tell yourself that you might as well skip this one because finding an apartment in New York has nothing to do with you, just take a few minutes to read to the end. I promise that there is a bigger meaning behind everything that I write! 

I'm looking for an apartment in New York City because I will be moving there when I graduate in December. However, my search today is much different than it was earlier this year, and let me tell you why. When I first started apartment hunting I was looking for really nice apartments; you know, big ones with big bright windows, a 24 hour gym, and a lobby. Now, if you are familiar with New York City prices, you know that a tiny, hole-in-the-wall room (not an apartment, just a room) costs you no less than $800 a month (if you're lucky). This is why some people rent out their closet space! It's true! Seriously, it is. Anyway, I wasn't about to live in something like that; it had to be nice. The rooms I was looking at had price tags of over $1,300 easily. I didn't care that I would end up blowing off almost all of my work money on just rent, as long as I lived in a place that was trendy and luxurious. And that would still be my mentality today if I had not learned the difference between rich people and those who are truly wealthy. 

Here's the difference: Rich people are those who are obsessed with making money and flaunting it. The mentality of these people is, "Woohoo, I have all this money! I have to dress the part now! I need to get the most expensive clothes, the latest cars, and the expensive mansion! I need to go out every night and pop open bottle after bottle of Patron, Grey Goose...the whole nine yards!" And yeah, they have a great time, but it's short lived. Then, they are caught having to dramatically decrease their spending after a sudden realization that they have depleted all of the money that they've worked so hard for. Or worse yet, they don't realize the situation they've driven themselves into and just keep living that lifestyle while putting everything on a credit card. Unfortunately, this is exactly how I used to think.

Now, here is the mentality of the truly wealthy people: these people live humbly.  Their money stays for the duration of their lives because they know that for it to last they need to live HUMBLY in the beginning. They think above and beyond the rest of the population, look towards the distant future (not just instant gratification), and realize that taking a step down temporarily will be worth it in the end. Why rush to buy yourself a mansion (that you're only going to use 1/16th of) when it's only gonna give you hundreds of thousands of dollars to pay in just property taxes alone each year! That's an unnecessary waste of your money. Or why pay over $200,000 for a brand new car? Just because you can? That's ridiculous. And yet, this happens all the time to newbies with money and then they're left out in the cold. Now, I'm not saying you have to live in a hole-in-the-wall. You can definitely upgrade to nicer things but do so wisely and always ask yourself before every purchase, "Now, is this really necessary? Do I really need to blow off all of this money on a mansion right this second, or can it wait till I've made a plan of how to make my money last me for a while." Just go ask those who are truly wealthy to this day. They'll all tell you how they didn't start off with the $200,000 cars.

All this ties back to my apartment hunting story (See I promised it would all blend together in the end!). Technically, I could get the really nice fancy apartment if I wanted to, but then I'd have no money for anything else. I'd be maxing out credit card after credit card to buy the real necessities in life. Sending myself in a downward spiral, I'd eventually have to frantically find someone to take over my lease so that I can downgrade to something more suitable for an entry-level worker fresh out of college who is just starting her life in the "real" world. Because that's what I am. I'm no millionaire. Heck, I'm barely even a thousandaire! (i know what you're thinking! Just go along with me and pretend like its a word) So, instead of taking the, "Woohoo, I'm gonna make all this money with my new job," route, I'm gonna do it the wealthy people way. I'm gonna be smart about my money, know that I want it to last, and move into a decent apartment that's more suitable for me and my situation. And you know what? It's gonna pay off in the end because from here, after planning out my money carefully, I can only go up. In ten years from now, when I'm living in a nice house with my family and still have money to last me a lifetime, I'll look back and congratulate myself for thinking smart and having humble beginnings.

That's what the truly wealthy people are doing today.

With all my love,

Hennely

#2- Achieving what we want in life

A pretty cool thing happened to me today in class. We had a guest speaker from an Ad agency come in, a really cool and creative guy, and towards the end of his lecture he showed us a picture of his ad agency's founder's jet. Then he asked, "Who here knows they will have a jet someday". Me and two other people raised our hands in a class of 80. Then he said, "Those who didn't raise their hands will never have a jet, because you don't even believe you will." If someone had asked me that question a year ago I would of said, "Yeah I would like one, but it's not like its ever gonna happen, that's just too crazy". Well, is it? 

Right now we live in a world where anything is possible, where young students build up websites not even realizing the momentum they're about to create and become millionaires before they even hit their 25th birthday. Where all you have to do is see things in a creative way, and everyone will catch on. Anything is possible now. You need to start believing that you can have whatever it is that you want.  It's not enough to just say, "It would be cool to have that one day", you need to really know that it's going to be yours. You need to already be thinking how it's going to look on the inside, what kind of colors you are going to use, how excited you are going to be the first time you see this jet rolling out of the hanger as a man comes up to you with the final papers and says "Its all yours". You need to see yourself sitting in one of those plushy leather recliners, having a drink, and talking to whoever it is that's on the jet with you as you two fly to an important business meeting or event. SEE YOURSELF THERE!  KNOW that it is yours and go make it happen!

 I know that most of you out there don't just want to be alive (a person with a pulse), you want to LIVE! The reason you want to make money is so that you can get the things you want, live the kind of lifestyle you've always dreamed of, or even use that money to give back to your parents or to your favorite charity. However,  you shouldn't live to work, you should work to Live! Working should be a means to an end. So on that note make sure to get into a field that truly makes you happy! Because if you are going to be working for many years, you should be enjoying it and doing something you love.

So I leave you with three ideas on what I feel like you should really be thinking about to achieve what you want in life:

1. Find something that truly makes you happy and make that your profession. Trust me, you will be thanking me 10 years down the line when you are walking around with a positive attitude and great energy and your friends who chose to just go with a job that paid them a little more money, are miserable.

2. Believe that you can have/achieve whatever it is that you want in life, no matter how far fetched it seems. The people who truly believe they will have what they want are the ones who actually get it in the end. They don't let obstacles (money, time) drown their ideas. The find a way to work around them because they know that one day, what they are dreaming in their head each night will become reality.

3. If you can find a new and innovative way of doing something, don't hold back! Do it, because times are changing. Traditional jobs are a thing of the past. Now everyone will be required to be an entrepreneur. This doesn't necessarily mean starting your own company, you can also be an entrepreneur within the company you work for now. This means finding creative solutions to problems within your field of work, instead of just doing the routine day to day job. Think on your toes, think of what's in store for the future, or better yet,  be the one who leads us to that future!

Anything is possible if you don't hold yourself back.

With all my love,

Hennely

#1- Finally caught up with technology!

Hey everyone! This is officially my first blog and boy does it feel good to finally be caught up with technology! The thing is though, now that I'm here, technology has already advanced seven steps ahead of me. It moves faster than we can catch up to it, so for now I'm content with my new blog and this is where I'll set up shop :)

My name is Hennely and I'm pursuing a career in acting. I love life, the sunshine, dancing is a passion, and I believe in the power of a smile :) I have a great family and an amazing boyfriend! There are lots of topics that I would love to discuss with you guys, so make sure to check back to see my opinions, insights, and words of wisdom about different aspects in life such as love, family, careers, relationships, and entertainment. See you soon!

With all my love,
Hennely