#13 What makes me feel beautiful

My blog today is for everyone to read this beautiful blog!! It will give you chills and make you see things from a different perspective. Enjoy!

http://www.realsimple.com/work-life/life-strategies/inspiration-motivation/makes-me-feel-beautiful-00000000017777/index.html?xid=WeeklyNews-090909

With all my love,

Hennely

#12 Reconnect with yourself: Are you being True?

After spending labor day weekend relaxing in what seemed like paradise with my boyfriend of one year, with no work, no cell phones, just me and him, I remembered the importance of leaving this busy world to reconnect.

Everyone needs a retreat, whether its to reconnect with loved ones, family, or just with yourself. Life (work, bills, appearance) always seems to get in the way. We pay more attention to all these other things that we think are more important and get so caught up in it. We need to ask ourselves: Who is the person that I really am? Am I putting on a front everyday or am I being real to myself and my thoughts? Do I live my life according to what other people think more than what I, and more importantly God, thinks? Don't sell yourself short. The personality you had when you were younger was there for a reason, don't go around altering it just to look good in front of others.

My boyfriend @G_NIUS is blowing up in the entertainment/music industry as Co-Founder of The Dream Big Hustle Hard Firm, best known for their industry events such as Beats on the Beach and The Dream Big Artist Showcase. They also founded DreamBigHustleHard.com and represent songwriters/producers Xplicit, The Fliptones, Red Spyda and Maria Zouroudis. He also recently resigned from Slip-N-Slide Records, where he was Director of Digital Development, New Media and Online Marketing, and it's so refreshing to see that he still remains true to who he is always. He doesn't put up a front, stays humble, and is always here with an open mind to help whoever needs it and comes his way, no matter how busy he is. That's why so many people respect him. I think that's how everyone needs to be. Don't let the money, fame, or status in life change who you are. God was the one who made it all happen, so make sure to always give him the thanks and appreciation, and just continue to work hard.

So take that time, get away from life for a second, and reconnect with yourself. Redefine who you are again, your values and morals, and don't lose sight of that from here on forward. Be true to yourself, always.

With all my love,

Hennely

#11- Dream Big, Hustle Hard

There are people out there who are currently content where they are with no desire to change. There are others who have spent their lives trying to achieve a dream and are now glorifying in all their success. Then there are those of us who know we belong somewhere, doing something we’ve always dreamed of but we have trouble building that bridge and connecting the person we are at present with the vision we have for ourselves in the future. Let me lay down an example: A girl works as a secretary in a business firm deep down has always wanted to own her own fashion line. How does she make that jump? How does she get out of that “rat race” where she needs the 9 to 5 to pay the bills but then doesn’t have time to pursue what she wants?

For one, THERE IS ALWAYS TIME! If it’s something that you truly want to do, you wouldn’t mind staying up till 4:30am to work on it, even after you’ve clocked out of your other job. That’s what the successful people do. Even those who don’t need the 9 to 5 to pay bills are always working ‘round the clock to make things happen. What makes you think you’re any different? In Twitterville it’s called the GrindFlu, and it means that, while the rest of the world is sleeping, you are one of the few out there staying up to make things happen! Those are the people whose dreams come true.

“Many of the great achievements of the world were accomplished by tired & discouraged men who kept on working”- RT on Twitter

Next, there are NO EXCUSES! Whether you are tired, don’t have enough money, may not have the latest and best equipment, nothing should hold you back! Work with what u have, don’t let anything stop you! If you work in a mall and can’t tweet because you don’t have a smart phone, go to the Apple store in the mall and tweet before work, after work and during your lunch break. Don’t have access to a computer at home? Go to the library! Its’ all about letting nothing stop you!

“There are no excuses when you're trying to get to the top”

Last, but definitely not least, realize that IN EVERYTHING, THERE IS AN OPPORTUNITY! Lets say you work at that 9 to 5 that you think has nothing to do with what you want in the future. Don’t just look at it as a job, realize that behind it, there is gold. Lets take the girl who works as a secretary for example. If she really wanted to she could turn her mindset around and realize that what she is actually learning by being in that job is invaluable things like time management, organization, and scheduling, all things that, if done right, will put her way ahead of the competition when starting her own fashion line. It’s all in the mindset! Once you realize how your job will truly help you for the future, you’ll now do it with that much more conviction and excitement because you’ll see that it’s all just preparation for when you are ready to go on your path!

We all have a purpose here on this Earth. Lets go out there and make it happen!!

With all my love,

Hennely

#10- Everybody's Free (To Wear Sunscreen)

This video came out many many years ago, but all the great advice still holds true today. It's amazing how much times don't change. Yes, maybe outside factors do, like inventing a new robot or communicating through the internet, but humanity, and what is truly important in this world for us to survive and pass along to our children, hasn't changed in centuries. And I can guarantee you it will never change.  

Enjoy the video!

#9- Why can't we reach our dreams? Or can we...

Sometimes, you have to push yourself in life.  Many of us can dream up of amazing things that we plan to do with our lives, what kind of house we want to live in, what kind of job would be so ideal, or what lifestyle we want, but then 40 years go by, and all of that is still stuff that’s only in our heads. You look back and wonder, “Where did all that time go? This was not where I saw myself, and I can never get this time back again.” What good is dreaming about things if we don’t push ourselves and make the first moves to accomplish it? Because if not, it’ll stay as that, just a dream.

You know how most people find it really hard to go to the gym, or to start that new diet and maintain it? The reason for this is because we don’t push ourselves hard enough. That’s the key word there: Enough. Sure, we give it a little try here and there, but it always falls short of reaching our goal. And then we give the excuse that  “we tried”, when in fact, we never tried hard enough to reach that turning point. That’s where the magic happens and that’s the point we have to get to in order to really turn things around. If we did, we’d find ourselves really engaged in what we’re doing and really liking it! It becomes second nature to us and part of our new lifestyle. Just like it takes a lot of force to get a heavy ball rolling, that’s how much force and energy we need to instill in accomplishing the things we want. And, just like the unstoppable momentum of the ball after it’s been pushed hard enough, so to, do our dreams and desires gain momentum and speed. But none of this happens if we give up before we reach that point. Whether it’s a new way of eating, a company you want to start, or a career change you’ve always dreamed of, life is about pushing ourselves to new extremes and trying things we never thought possible. Challenge yourself every day. Dare to accomplish something great, and to be a better you with each and every day.

#8- The Secret to Staying Together

A fellow Henster (people who follow my blogs) made a comment on my twitter saying that my blogs were good, but that they only talk about reasons why couples should stay apart. In order to change that, I did some research just now and came across another great article about staying together during the rough times. This is an excerpt from the book 101 Things I Wish I Knew When I Got Married by Linda and Charlie Bloom. Read it to the end! And if you would like to buy their book, click on the link at the bottom of their page!

http://innerself.com/html/relationships/marriage--commitment/being-marriedstaying-together.html

With all my love,

Hennely

#7- What type of Love Relationship are you in?

Hey guys!! Its been a very long time since I've written in here, and I will fill you in on ALL of my activities in my next blog, but today I wanted to share with you an article that I ran across that I found so interesting. It came to me because I noticed that all relationships are different and have their own way of doing things. For example, sometimes one person is more dominant than the other, or they can both be equal, so I wanted to know what type of relationship is the best one to be in. Is there a best type? Read this article to gain more insight. It was taken from statesville.com and was written by Bill Mitcham, a licensed marriage and family therapist and director of the Marriage Maintenance Center.

(Although the article says marriage, this applies to boyfriend/girlfriend relationships). Enjoy!

Virginia Satir, one of the great Master Marriage and Family Therapists, discovered six types of love relationships in her many years of working with couples. She gave all six of them names.

The first one she called "A Smothering Love Relationship." This is the couple who want to spend every second of their free time with each other. They can't tolerate being without each other. They are like a drug addict who can't go for very long without a fix. "Smothering Couples" call each other multiple times a day during work or talk constantly via e-mails. These couples cut off contact with friends they had before they married and live like they were stranded on an island and there are no other people on the island. Satir predicted these couples, sooner or later, get into trouble because they expect each other to meet all their social, emotional and psychological needs and this puts too much pressure on a marriage. The supportive friendships and extended family connections each spouse has can bring balance and stability to a marriage.

A second type of love-relationships is the "Pedestal Couple." This is the marriage where one partner worships and adores their spouse. Their marriage partner can do no wrong. "Pedestal Couples" tend to have a pattern where one is worshiped and the other is used. Sometimes the one who is worshiped detests being put on a pedestal and can be demeaning to their spouse, however this doesn't stop the sacrifices. The worshiper will do anything to try to please the object of his/her affection. Others who are put on a pedestal by their spouse enjoy the worship and learn to expect it or even demand it. Satir believes these marriages are headed for a ship wreck, because there is little mutual respect, a key ingredient in a successful marriage.

"Master/Slave Love Relationship" describes the third marital pattern. This couple is organized around a dominate/submissive pattern. The dominate one says, "I am in charge and I will make all the major decisions. You will do as I direct". One partner becomes the army sergeant and the other a private.

Often the slave partner is financially dependent on the master partner and believes they have to go along with the program to survive. Threats and physical violence are sometimes uses to get the other partner to submit to the will of the dominate one. Resentment, distancing and lack of genuine intimacy put this couple in danger of separation and divorce.

The fourth Satir pattern is the "Boarding House: Back to Back Love Relationship" This couple is the couple who are roommates. He goes his way and she goes her way. A typical day would be for both of them to arrive at home, fix a meal, and watch TV while they eat. Very few words are spoken, certainly no intimate expressions. He then goes to his computer or ballgame and she goes to her computer or out with a girlfriend. "Back to Back' couples have very little belly to belly activity since there is very little love flowing between them. The love that brought them together died of atrophy since there was so little togetherness, it didn't live very long. These couples can board together for a long time, but sooner or later one of them will say "Enough is enough, there is bound to be more to being married than this."

"A Martyr Love Relationship" describes the fifth type of couple. One member of the couple is the community saint. This is the marriage partner who gives to everyone except to their own spouse.

Persons married to ministers or rabbis are in danger of this pattern; however it is not always religions professionals. This could be the volunteer at church who gives endless hours to feed the homeless, signs up at school to chaperone the school dances, or attends every mission trip offered by the church or civic group. Meanwhile, the marital partner feels guilty for wanting time with the spouse and certainly couldn't get angry with one of God's angels. This marriage could be on an affair alert or a divorce alert.

The last marriage is labeled "A Balanced Love Relationship." This marriage is comprised of two persons who are whole and complete. They were happy individuals before they married. They married to share happiness and to expand their enthusiasm for living. They seek not to smother, dominate, worship, distance or rescue each other. They walk hand-in-hand and side-by-side and face each day and each year as best friends and staunchest allies. "The Balanced Couple" gives each other space to grow and savor their time together as gift.

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So Hensters (what I'm now going to call my devoted followers and fans!), what do you guys think? Is there a correct way to have a great relationship?

I want to hear your thoughts!

With all my love,

Hennely

If you would like to see the original post, copy and paste the following link:

http://www2.statesville.com/content/2008/sep/11/which-type-love-relationship-do-you-have/lifestyles-relationships_special_occasions-parenting/